WARNING: This October Thought comes with footnotes. They jump out in crazy places. You have been warned.
Monday’s are my errand days. Everything that needs to get done for the week happens on Monday. I cook extra meals; I do laundry and yard work, pay bills, visit vendors etc. When I get in to work on Tuesday everyone always asks me, ooh what fun things did you do on your days off, and of course I sound like the most boring person on the face of the earth. Um, I folded my socks and took a nap after I got done cleaning out the drip trays on the stove. I swear, 5 year old Rebecca is shaking her head in abject misery at hearing about how I spend my weekends. At least sometimes I have ice cream for dinner, so I have that going for me.
This Monday was no different. I had a very ambitious list of grown up things to
do. I always have ambitious lists on Monday. I make them on Sunday when I am
rested and feeling energetic. I KNOW that I will never accomplish everything on
the list, but maybe, maybe I just might so I had better put everything on there
I can possibly think of. Then Monday rolls around and I cross a few things off
the list, but not enough and eventually I have to be happy that I crossed off
anything at all. But seriously, the only way I will ever be able to cross off
all my things is if I get my hands on Hermione Granger's Time Turner. Apparently
the one you can buy from the Noble Collection and the one in the movie do not
possess the same magic, but I digress.
So yesterday I adulted with the best of them. I voted. I
paid my taxes early. I did both the laundry and the dishes and I stripped and remade
my bed. I was the epitome of a responsible adult, if you discount the t-shirt I
was wearing, but that is a story for another day. Then 3:45pm rolled around and
all my best laid plans went straight down the tubes but in the best way
possible. I stopped by work to drop of bingo prizes and to pick up some stuff.
I ended up staying for an hour and a half talking to coworkers, buying donuts
for a resident and watching a Halloween baking challenge with my mom who was
horrified by what those people were doing to perfectly good cakes.
After that I went grocery shopping (back to adulting) but I
did buy 4 giant bags of candy* so I wasn’t totally responsible. All month long I
have said that this year, I am not going to open my door for trick or treaters.
I don’t know if there will even be any out and about, but I didn’t particularly want plague
children willingly running up to my door. You all saw the sign I bought in preparation
for my Halloween grinchiness. But, as I was driving around doing more errands I
got to thinking, I really want to keep my lights on. I don’t want them off or
have to explain to those who come to my door why the lights are on but I won’t answer. I’m sorry small child, I know trick or treat etiquette, but
you see, this middle aged spinster would like to look at her Halloween lights and
not be bothered by the likes of you. Off you pop you little germ goblin. Yeah,
I don’t see that going well for me or the side of my house. So I totally caved
and WILL be handing out treats this year. I am getting pretty excited. I
honestly don’t know who is more excited by this, me or the trick or treaters?
Last year I didn’t even let them ring the bell; I was already on the porch
waiting for them as they walked up the driveway. I even scared a few with my over
eagerness. Yup, I’m a middle aged spinster creeper. I don’t even need a
costume.
Anyway, I got back home and unloaded all my candy and made
dinner and then sat down to do finances, (yup, back to adulting) when I noticed
that the grocery store had overcharged me. So back I went to straighten things out.
Turns out it will take me more than one visit to get this fixed. Of course. On
the way back home I totally could have stewed and grumbled, but instead I
decided to keep being responsible and drop off some Tupperware I had borrowed. It was early enough in the evening and the bowl was in my car, so I stopped at my friend’s house. What
started as a simple drop and go ended up being an hour long visit where I
laughed so hard I cried, and I got a cookie. I left in much better spirits.
As I started driving home I passed by more houses with
Halloween décor and I made a decision, the night was not young, but I had a cookie
in hand and a full tank of gas and by golly I was going to go out and look at
decorations. So, like the middle aged, night time creeper spinster I am, I
drove around the neighborhoods looking at lights. I know, I know, most people
do that for Christmas, but as you well know, I am not most people. I just
happened to have my Songs of Halloween tape in my car (just happened, pfft, who
am I kidding, it is in there all month long) so I popped it in and cruised. It
was a beautiful night and there were even more decorations to be seen. The
people who have my favorite October house have added even more to their
tableau. Now there are 9 foot spider webs everywhere and a GIANT spider on top
of their house. They have a really cute Frankenstein that I am thinking of offering
them money for. I almost drove into a fire hydrant rubbernecking while looking
at it. The house is AMAZING and I have decided that I will be marrying whoever
lives there. I don’t care if they are already married, a thrupple will work, especially
if one of them takes a very loooooong vacation. Hey, people have gotten married
for less. I mean, I already know we are compatible. They like to decorate for
Halloween, what more do I really need to know? And they say romance is dead.
I got back home around 11 or so and it was an amazing night.
It was waaaaay too warm in my house so I decided I needed to camp out in the
back yard. Cuz why not just turn on the ceiling fan when you can set up your
summer yurt thing that has never been out of the box and then drag your extra
twin mattress outside? Sounds totally reasonable and not at all crazy. My dog
looked at me like I had lost my mind, but clearly I needed protecting because I
had taken leave of my senses and who knows what shenanigans I would get into
without him, so he reluctantly went out with me.
Our fun October backyard camping experience lasted until
about 1am when some weird demon bird woke us both up. It made the strangest
noise I have ever heard. I can't even begin to describe it, that's how strange it was. I tried to record it but it turned out akin to when
people try to photograph Bigfoot. You can hear a noise but it really could be
anything and it just makes you look extra crazy. The demon bird thing wouldn’t
let up and sounded like it was getting closer and closer to our yurt/tent.
Neither my dog nor I wanted to have our souls sucked out so we very bravely
went back inside the house, which felt even warmer because it was 20 degrees
hotter than outside. This time I had learned my lesson and turned on the ceiling
fan. As soon as we got in bed the demon bird stopped hoot chirping. I don’t
think it liked us being out there. Either that or it sucked the soul out of
something else. Either way, we were safe.
So that was my somewhat spontaneous, but wonderful October day. I love unexpected pockets of joy like that. Oh, and the cookie was delicious.
*When I was very seriously perusing the candy aisle, I found Glow in the Dark Hershey bars and Kit Kats. I was all, WHAT??? How did they make the chocolate glow in the dark? Does this mean it is radioactive candy? Why would they sell that? But how cool! And then I read further and saw that only the wrappers are glow in the dark. I was a lot less impressed. But that does sound safer.
* * This was the very responsible shirt I wore whilst adulting.
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